Weight Loss Journey Update

I haven't updated on my weight loss journey in a while.

I don't weight myself weekly. I determined from the beginning that this was going to be a lifestyle change in me, not something that was a fad or a fleeting thing, so I didn't want to put a lot of pressure on myself to lose a certain amount in a certain time frame. My goal was 30 pounds in 12 months. If I lost it all in 6 months, great. If it too the whole 12, that's great too. If I didn't make it all the way, then... well, that would be a bummer, but if that was the case I'd just try again.

I started weighing myself every other week. Now it's more like once a month. I lost a LOT those first two or three months and I didn't want to be disappointed when I wasn't losing as quickly towards the middle and end. And you can see that I actually gained 2 pounds at one point. I didn't let it slow me down. We'd had a lot of snow days (and I'm a boredom eater) so I just reencrouaged myself to keep going. Here's my breakdown:

Jan. 1: 228.0

Jan. 16: 222.6

Jan. 31: 218.4

Feb. 16: 219.6

Mar. 6: 220

Mar. 27: 217.6

Apr. 10: 216.8

May 24: 211.8

My total weight loss so far is 16.2, which I think is pretty gos darn good. We're about halfway done with the year and I'm more than halfway done with my goal.

One of the most popular questions I get is "How are you doing it?"

Honestly, it was a total attitude change. I knew I was a boredom/stress eater. I knew that potato products are my weakness (seriously... I have no problem passing up ice cream or a Snickers bar, but ask me if I want the tortilla chips or the fries with my entree and I will almost always cave). I knew that I needed to get more active. I knew that if I didn't have a gym buddy, I wouldn't get there regularly. SO I found checks and balances to those things before I started all of this.

1. I tracked my diet (not diet like lose weight diet but like everything i eat diet) for about a month to see when I ate and what I ate and how much I ate. I found that I often eat mutliple servings of things. Like, I would just fill a bowl until it looked "full enough." With our Jambalaya, for example (we eat it a lot in our house), I was eating at least twice as much as I needed to and feeling full. I desperately needed to change that.

2. After I tracked everything, I revamped what I ate. I now use mayo made with olive oil, fat free cheese, fat free yogurt (which I was already eating -- I like the Yoplait, or Weight Watchers brands and Aldi has 2 yum flavors that I like in their Fit & Active line). I incorporate more fruits and veggies into every meal (the fruit isn't hard, it's the veggies that are hard because I don't like many). We drastically cut our "eating out" budget so that we're eating at home more (saves money AND calories because I have a drive to finish everything on my plate since I'm paying for it all, you know?) I continued to track for 3 months every single thing that went in my mouth. I don't track anymore but I probably will start again soon.

3. I drink water. I cannot stress this enough. I was never much of a soda drinker, but when I'm stressed the fizziness definitely soothes me. Needless to say, I drank a lot of soda throughout most of Sept-Nov because I was so stressed at my old job. Now I use a water bottle or a cup (I have this cute one from Family Christian and desperately want another one) all day every day. I fill it (or have my kids fill it) 5 times in the course of my 10 hour work day. When I want some flavor, I use the Crystal Light packets. I like the Strawberry and Grape ones and also the Raspberry Lemonade.

4. I hit the gym at least 2x a week. Sometimes only once, sometimes 3x, but 2x is a definite because I go with a friend. Towards the end of April I was so busy with church stuff that I regrettably have to inform you that I didn't go to the gym for a while. Shameful, I know. I was actually shocked when I got on the scale and had maintained my weight. Anyway, I go with my friend L on Sunday afternoons and we do about half an hour on the elliptical machine. This is our time to catch up on the week's happenings in each other's lives because when we meet up on Tuesdays we take a class. For a while I was trying to get in a third day swimming in the pool but I'm so wiped after work that I haven't been going. now I'm off on Thursdays, though, so I'm planning on utilizing those days from now on.

On Tuesday nights, L and I go to BodyFlow. It's a tai chi, yoga, and pilates combination and at first I was skeptical. A lot of yoga has its roots in Eastern religion cultures and finding your center in yourself -- a lot of things I theologically disagree with. But the first night we were there -- Valentine's day week -- the instructor played Shadowfeet by Brooke Fraser (of Hillsong) and it was like God was saying, "It's okay for you to do yoga. At the end of class we have a 10 minute period where we just relax (seriously -- what other class can you do that in??) and I often use that time to pray and meditate on my church's Dwelling scripture for the week. Very cool. Anyway, I feel like I get such a workout every week and I really want to take a second class. I'll probably start taking the Saturday morning class at my gym.

4. I'm not too hard on myself. I think this is extremely important. I never had a terrible self image to begin with, but I wasn't happy. I didn't like how I looked in photos, and I could only imagine what I would look like once I got pregnant and gained x amount of pounds. I also wanted to just be in better shape. We have a conference coming up in July in the Rockies and one of the things we do is hike a mountain. I want to do that and accomplish that without dying in the process. I also am a bridesmaid in my best friend's wedding in October and I want to look nice for that.

Anyway, back to the not being to hard on my self. That month where I gained weight was just motivation to keep going. So I backtracked for a few weeks. It's not the end of the world. Just keep pressing on. I also still allow myself a few things: regular ranch (because I think FF ranch is just NASTY), a candy bar every now and then, and a "calorie binge" every few weeks. Want to eat half of a pizza? Go for it. As long as it's not a daily or even a weekly thing, your weight is not going to balloon. And, yes, I still have my bad days where I feel like I"m CONSTANTLY eating, but I just get back on my horse the next day.

This journey isn't just about losing weight. The weight loss is a number I put on the assignment so that there was something tangible to track. I'm losing weight so I can get into shape, so I can get pregnant, so I can buy new clothes (YES!), and so I can build healthy habits I hope to pass onto my children. But mostly, what I'm finding is a confidence in myself that I didn't know I lacked. I thought I was confident and that I didn't have a body image issue, but the fact is that I did. And in the last 6 months, I have found a part of me that wants to be pretty and now I feel pretty. I am more conscious of what I'm wearing, I fix my hair, I'm starting to get more interested in fashion jewelry, and I feel sexier (to the delight of J, LOL).

I still have 6 months to go. I know there may be a weigh in here and there where I've gained a bit and that's okay. It's not the end of the world. I'm really enjoying this journey. I'm enjoying my BodyFlow class. I love that I can see one of my best friends 2x a week.

And I love that new clothes lie at the end. =)

Pinterest

Have you heard of Pinterest? It's my new obsession. I've found a whole lot of teaching ideas, hair styles, weight loss motivation on there. For example:

^This^ is something I found on there on someone's design/crafty board and thought, "What a GREAT idea! Such a fun, new way to paint!" It's a block of wood wrapped in yarn. So cool!

This is one of the first things I found on there. I mean, who thinks of these things? This seems so obvious, but I NEVER would have thought of it!! This could be used with word families, math facts, etc. Genius!

Here is a screenshot of my teaching board from there:

I also have a board for style, weight loss motivation, ideas for the home, nursery ideas (NO -- not preggers... just compiling ideas), recipes to make... It's amazing and I have spent WAY too much time on there in the last few weeks.

Seriously, you should try it. =)

Mostly...

You are about to read a post of ramblings from my brain. I just need to get this off of my chest.

I want a baby.

For most of you, this is not news. I talk about wanting to be a mom all the time but that "it's not the right time," or "we're enjoying our alone time." Which is all true.

Mostly.

The truth is, a few months ago, J gave the go ahead to let the chips fall where they fall. We both know that God is going to give us a family when He's ready to give us a family. (No, we're not Dugger-y in that way... we just trust in what He has in store for us.) And really? I'm okay with that.

Mostly.

I'm halfway through my weightloss journey (officially -- woohoo! 15 pounds lighter!) and honestly I was expecting something to have changed. But my cycle is still wonky and I feel like a baby isn't in our cards right now. Which is okay.

Mostly.

Then there's the part of me that wishes, hopes, dreams, to start our family now. I thought I might be pregnant about 6 weeks ago. Took a test. BFN (Big Fat Negative, to those not up on the lingo). So, okay, no baby for now. That's a good thing, right? Right.

Mostly.

But let's face it, people. There are a few things I feel called by God to do: sing, teach, and be a wife and mom. I'm actually doing 3 of the 4, and I know that when God wants us to have a baby then we'll have one, and we're not actively trying, but... I don't even know how to put it into words.

I'm involved on a message board that I've been on since shortly after getting engaged. A lot of the ladies who got married shortly before/after me are pregnant. Or have had a baby. So I'm reading all of these announcements and listening to all of their questions and worries and whatnot, and a small (okay, maybe not that small) part of me is -- I'll just say it -- jealous. *I* want to be pregnant. *I* want to be planning a nursery. *I* want to be worrying about my clothes not fitting and finding the perfect preschool and omigod how are we going to afford everything and what if they have bad reflux or need tubes or are sick all of the time?

I want to grow a human inside myself.

Mostly.

The other side of me thinks about how much debt we can pay down now before we have a baby. It thinks about how nice it is to sleep 8 hours straight. It thinks about how I'm enjoying this new, 213 pound version of myself. I thinks about how life right now is good. I have a good husband who loves me (even though I can be a PITA sometimes...) and two cats who need as much attention as any baby. I have a great job where I can go and play with kids all day.

And then I'm good. For a while at least. Until someone else announces that they're pregnant. And I'm excited for them, really, but I get that pang again.

It's not like I've lost a baby. No miscarriages here, folks. Never been pregnant at all, which raises a new set of worries.

So for now, I sit and think about the baby I want in the future. I plan hypothetical nurseries. I read about other people's journeys and think that someday it will be my journey. And whether that someday is soon or far along down the road, I'm okay with that.

Mostly.

Fall TV 2011-2012

In case you missed it, most of the networks announced their fall TV schedules. Some of my favorites (Parenthood, Harry's Law, and Brothers & Sisters) hadn't officially been renewed and I was worried. But two out of three ain't bad.

Parenthood and Harry's Law were renewed. Hurray! They're both relatively new and I was hoping NBC would realize the potential in them both and renew them. B&S had run its course, so I'm kind of okay with it being cancelled. Their season finale, since their fate was still up in the air, was a good closure kind of episode.

Anyway, here is the list of renewals from TVGuide.Com.

I'm not surprised that as of now One Tree Hill is unknown. I'm actually surprised it's still on. I quit watching when Peyton and Lucas left, because, frankly, they were One Tree Hill...

Why I Love Teaching

Kids really DO say the darnedest things. Cases in point:

I was making a sign reminding parents that we close early on Good Friday (this was Wed. beforehand).

G: What are you doing?

Me: making a sign reminding your parents to pick you up early on Friday.

G: Why?

Me: 'Cause we're closing early.

G: Oh, yeah. 'Cause God died for us on Friday.

Me: (Totally blown away by this statement) That's right! What's special about Sunday?

G: That's when the Easter Bunny comes.

Welp, she's almost there.

On Good Friday, I asked my kids who got a new dress for Easter. This got them talking about church. N said she goes on Saturdays and I was curious so I asked her if she was Jewish. She had no idea so I asked her to describe her church.

N: Well, there's a guy who talks. And we stand and then sit and then get on our knees a lot.

Me: Is there a cross on the wall?

N: Yes.

Me: With a guy on it?"

I: That's Jesus Christ. Christ is His last name.

T lives with his grandparents because both his parents are deceased. He is not embarrassed or sad about this. He will tell you point blank that his parents are dead.

A: Whoa, Momma!

T: Whoa, Grandma!

Me: Are your listening ears on, everybody?

M: My ears are on, and ready to rock and roll.

I: Miss Jessica?

Me: Yes, I?

I: I love you.

Me: Aw, I love you, too, baby.

G: Almost all of us love you.

Seriously, pre kindergarteners are AWESOME. I loved my 2's, don't get me wrong, and they said some funny stuff, but my 5's amaze me, not just in the funny things they say, but the quesitons they ask. This group in particular is just full of SPONGES. Seriously, we're way past where they SHOULD be for Kindergarten. They could probably skip to the 2nd semester of Kindergarten or even 1st grade and most of them would be fine. We just keep throwing stuff at them and they keep wanting more. I love it.

Next year's group will probably prove to be quite the challenge. Their group dynamic is totally different (they're boy heavy as opposed to our 5/11 boy/girl ratio now) and they have a hard time sitting still. They're a busy group of kids and I actually welcome the challenge. My student teaching class was a fairly easy class, too, so having my "rotten" class from the get go sounds nice. Get it out of the way for seven years, LOL. (Seriously, though, they aren't rotten. Please don't misconstrue what I mean. I welcome the challenge.) I know that some things we do now will have to change and our whole approach to learning may have to change, but I'm excited for it.

But, for now, I relish in my sponge class. This week we're learning about ocean animals and I looked up some YouTube videos on my phone with while sounds and played them. They kept asking me questions. Thank God for my Android phone; I just searched for the answers. Yesterday we were talking about Kentucky (we're on a states unit in Social Studies) and one of the kids asked why Frankfort was named Frankfort. Seriously, these kids keep me on my toes and they are teaching ME things because I'm constantly having to look stuff up to answer their questions.

I love teaching, and I love that I love teaching. I love that I have known what I wanted to do since I was a little girl -- and that it pretty much stayed that way as I grew older. I love my job.

(Oh, and here's the story behind the name of Frankfort: "The town of Frankfort likely received its name from an event that took place in 1780s when Native Americans attacked a group of pioneers from Bryan’s Station who were making salt at a ford in the Kentucky River. One of the pioneers, Stephen Frank, was killed and the crossing became known as "Frank’s Ford." This name was later shortened to Frankfort.")